October 2021

“Twin flames are two halves cut from the same whole.”

Whereas your soulmate is a person with whom you connect at a deeper, intimate level, they are very similar to you in many aspects but won’t be the same..” says Rachel, a counselor who has been practicing Spiritual Psychology for the past few decades.

“People often mistake soulmates to be restricted towards their significant others and twin flames for their adventurous relationships”

This is not true.

Who is a soulmate?

Your soulmate can be anyone, right from your best friend to your mentor, your sibling, or even more commonly seen in your intimate relationships.

A Soulmate, from a psychological point of view, is a person with whom you share a very deep and meaningful emotional, physical, and spiritual bond.

It’s the person whom you connect with not only on a conscious level, ie through shared intense eye contact, or can gauge their feelings through their tone of voice but also at an unconscious level.

It’s like you just know them, maybe because you have spent a considerable amount of time together, or maybe because you both have shared something important to you. 

Thus the bond is very pure and healthy and not toxic or too demanding.

What are Twinflames?

Rachel says that Twin flames are like Yin and Yang. The soul has masculine and feminine energy, they were initially part of the same soul but were cut off from each other. 

And now they lie restless and wander until they meet.

Do twin flames share some meaningful past or aspects? Like soulmates?

It is quite subjective, but here is a possibility that you two would share many quirks and hobbies, likes and dislikes. 

In many cases, twin flames have faced similar issues or problems in the past, for example, bullying, parental neglect, toxic partners, etc.

It’s the initial spark, as you meet them, you feel this instant jittery feeling of knowing this is “home“

But as the initial attraction fades away, the next stage is for you both to face your worst fears.

Maybe you have this fear of commitment and your twin flame has a fear of losing the one they love, then this is where you would find yourself in a catch twenty-two situation, 

You either work upon your unhealed traumas 

Or

You walk away from this relationship. 

People usually select the second option, for changing your past habits, resolving your inner conflicts takes a lot of time and also effort. 

But doesn’t this connection of Twin flame make both individuals obsessed with one another? 

People love the initial honeymoon phase that comes along with twin flame relationships but only a few take the additional step.

As for obsession, this is a human tendency to know more and more about a person, so much so that you would be thinking about them the entire day. 

That feeling is closely associated with Limerence, which a lot of people believe applies to twin flames too.

But being obsessed would mean you are not being productive or this love is hindering you from working upon yourself and your ambitions. 

The mere reason one meets their twin flame is so that you can become a better version of yourself as your twin points those out and forces you to see them.

They can push you to face your worst fears, your previously held assumptions, heal from your past wounds, etc. the one that you would not wish to come to par with.

So is there a likelihood that these twin flame, soulmate relationships could become messy and borderline unhealthy?

A lot of times, people believe that their overwhelming relationship with an emotionally toxic or emotionally unavailable partner is their twin flame relationship or soulmate one.

Relationships with a narcissist for example would often start on similar lines, with love bombing, but once the narcissist is done utilizing you for their own needs they shall look for ways to push you away.

In Twin flame relationships, there is a push and pull experience ie, there is a chaser (mostly the masculine energy) and a runner (the feminine one) though the same order does not need to be followed, at times it is reversed.

The reason why there is a chaser-runner relationship is that it is believed that one of the halves has understood the greater purpose and has evolved and is the one who often chases. The runner or the other half who is scared or too overwhelmed by their insecurities / past wounds.

Thus, twin flame relationships are seen to be on and off relationships, until the lessons are learned and the people involved  have understood the bond they share, they shall end up running into one another.

For soulmates, the connection is instant, almost on similar lines to twin flames. But soulmates are not as intense or overwhelming as twin flame relationships. 

Think of soulmates as bread and butter, they complement each other, whereas twin flames are like a part of the same bread loaf.

Thus, with soulmate relationships, you would have shared interests for the future, growth, security. They just “get” you.

Soulmate relationships are difficult to walk away from because you both have an intense need to be a part of each other’s life, but it won’t be in an obsessively unhealthy way, rather you would make sure you are a part of their life, either maybe by meeting every day or living together, etc.

Can a Twinflame be your soulmate? Or vice versa?

Nope, your twin flame cannot be your soulmate or vice versa.

Your twin flame is basically you, either an unhealed version or a healed one, whose purpose is to guide you to understand your true self, one that you kept running away from. 

Thus you both will aid each other or bring out the worst in each other, but there is always a chance that your twin could be constantly pinching those insecurities and you may or may not together work upon changing those aspects.

For a soulmate, you come “together, there is a feeling of “WE” you will make sure you encourage your soulmate to grow together, intellectually or emotionally.

So what are some misconceptions that people usually have about twin flames and soulmates?

People say that their pet can be their twin flame, their mentor could be their twin flame, which is not true.

Your twin flame is someone with whom you share intense sexual desires, share their greatest fears, apprehensions, joy, etc. 

There is profound sexual desire, almost as though it needs to be fulfilled.

With your twin flame, you are bound to come together with them for your union is destined to bring a change mostly for a greater purpose. 

Your job there is to heal, to become a better version of yourself, and grow as an individual.

For soulmates, there is a misconception that there can only be one true “ Soulmate” forever in your life. 

But that is simply not true, you can have more than one soulmate connection.

But would that mean if they meet once they are more likely to stay forever?

“Nope, think of twin flames as seeing yourself in the mirror. There is a chance you would first feel there is nothing wrong or that everything is good. 

But as you look deeper into this mirror you would be able to see all those insecurities, your deepest fears, anxieties, coming out into action.

It would be almost very turbulent and a difficult journey.

One that usually does not last that long but it is a relationship that would teach you many important aspects about your own self. 

Its intensity is such that it forces you to either change those negative aspects about yourself and heal away from your past wounds, or you either run away and never look back.

A Lot of times people end up getting back in there on and off twin flame relationship, this would be too tiring.

It either means you are healing from your past wounds or you are either ignorant about them.

Thus as you cannot stand in front of the mirror your entire life, you may or may not always end up with your twin flame.

For soulmates, however, it has been observed that they do last.

Since it includes platonic relationships, friendships, your BFF too could be your soulmate. Thus it is likely that once you both are attuned with each others vibe and can easily communicate anything and everything with them, it automatically makes them an essential part of your life,

This bond that you share is very peculiar to you both alone.

Thus, in the soulmate V/S Twin Flame battle, it’s more likely the Soulmate who wins the race.